With You Jesus, nothing's wrong even when it is. You take all the pain away... I'm in. All in.

Parents both out workin to the bone

2/17/14

If internalizing,
reflecting,
mentally preparing,
and spiritually growing
were jobs
I'd get an A+

I am not just a constant work in progress. I am beautiful now, in the present.

February 2, 2014

I want to feel like I'm doing things right, Lord.

Like I am pleasing unto You.

That is when THIS will all click.
That is when life will regain the vibrancy it once had.
That is when the past will completely be erased.

When I know I am on Your path.
When I believe I belong only to You.

That is when I will be healed.
That is when I'll be forgiven.
That is when I can truly move forward.
See life in color again; I've been struggling so much for this.

That is when I will have joy in every moment, during each task no matter if perceived trivial.
That is when I will have FREEDOM.

I will live in freedom.

That is when I will truly know my boundaries and GUARD THEM with FULL armor that You provide.
That is when I will be able to truly live for You.
That is when I will be able to truly love.

That is when I will be able to go to sleep at night and say to myself,
"Job well done today, Jess. Love you. So proud of how you spent the day! Sweet dreams, God's child."

That is when I will be able to rebuke any demon because of my faith in Your power and exercising Your authority.

That is when I will be fully full again.

That is when...

Well the realization is now...

The blessing and peace is therefore no longer a matter of when...

It is here.



Now.

A prayer 2.2.14

i desire to please God
not people

love by action
not word and emotion

be fully healed, then heal
instead of pretending like i have everything together

i want to believe
that life doesn't have to be so hard

and the humbling reality is
that i don't have it all together

the more humbling reality;
that all of us are trying to get it together
and if we're not
we are
to realize,
to accept that,
strips away any idea that we are in this life alone
we are going through similar struggles
or at least,
navigating common human emotions at the same time

life
needs an answer

life
demands a purpose

life
needs hope,
healing,
enlightenment,
encouragement,
love,
peace

life needs something more than itself
life needs the Source
life
needs to focus on itself at times
and on others at time
and on itself
and others
at the same time
and sometimes there is a battle of focus
and you can't be a person who is emotional contagion
because you end up neglecting the very essence of your needs,
your being,
your rights

be you
be true
to that light
be love too
be generous
focus
learn to embrace
learn to give
and especially receive
focus more on yourself
and stay true to that angel

life
needs the Source
i am blessed He lives in my chest
and in my ever-present awareness
and lack of awareness
in my mindlessness he lets me fall tripping to the ground
to wake me up

oh! sorry, Lord, i was too zoned out in anxious thoughts again
thanks for bringing me back

life
needs the Source
i am blessed He lives in my chest
embodies and lets out his aroma in my faculties that are saturated with His joy

life
needs the Source
without it,
it's empty

I.
need You, Jesus.
Take my weakness,
and transform it by Your power.

I need you in my life
You are my life.
You died for me, I live for You.
Lord, let not my spirit fail.

Amen,
your daughter